June 20, 2011

Being a Maid/Matron of Honor: Part 1

I'm Back! That is right! Have no more Monday worries because I am now able to post all the time. It has never felt better to login to blogger and start typing. I have a large smile on my face and am dancing around the room. You are welcome for that mental image.


This week I wanted to focus my attention on one leading lady crucial for most weddings, the Maid of Honor. Most girls have been bridesmaids but being a maid of honor has some higher expectations. Yes, that is me with my dear friend Summer. Even thought I have been a bridesmaids numerous times, I have only been a maid of honor once. I wish I could say that I was a professional with my utmost title but I feel their are still lessons I am learning from my best friends wedding. When Summer asked me to be her maid of honor, she gave me a helpful handbook written by Kathy Passero. I have taken a lot of advice from this book and am hoping that the tips I share with you can help in your abilities to be your best in all weddings.

Some of these tips are pretty simple but always a good reminder plus they can also be applied to all bridesmaids too! Not every wedding has a maid of honor.

Prewedding Tips:

1. Attend all events - This includes the engagement party and showers. The bride will need you to be by her side helping her through each event. Most brides have three plus events which means you can help with picking out her outfit, assisting with advice on hostess gifts, providimg a record of who gave what gifts and even help with thank you notes.

2. Remain positive and upbeat - Lets face it. Planning a wedding is stressful. Help the bride with encouraging her! Each time she calls, remain positive and cheery. She needs it plus you are the one she chose to be a bridesmaid and/or maid of honor! Duty calls!

3. Take the lead in organizing a shower - Any maid of honor should expect to host a shower. You can recruit the other bridesmaids to help in expenses and planning.

4. Show up for your fittings plus pay for all your expenses - These expenses can include your dress, shows, accessories plus any other expenses like hotel accommodations for the wedding. Attending any fittings that the bride has scheduled for your dress is important. Make sure you are prompt and eager to help with her fittings and your own. By being active in the wedding planning process, your bride can feel your support and know that she is important to you.

5. Be ready to step in whenever needed - Yes, even if the bride has called 7 times already in the past hour. If she needs you to help address invitations or select wedding favors, get to it. She needs you. You are her sanity.

Wedding Whirlwind Tips:

1. Attend rehearsal and rehearsal dinner - For most, this is a given but make sure you are early as well. Never be the reason the bride is having to wait to start her rehearsal.

2. Make a toast at the rehearsal (Optional)

3. Run any last minute errands or perform any last minute tasks - For example, if the bride forgets to assemble the place cards for the reception let her know that you will take care of it. The night before weddings can be stressful but most brides have things completed. Occasionally you have a chaotic bride and end up creating the wedding program at 2 a.m. then going to a 24 hour Kinko's to make copies. True story. Right Laura?

4. Again stay positive - You have your bride dressed, are posing for pictures in uncomfortable heels, dealing with the crying bridesmaids but keep that smile on. The bride needs your upbeat spirit to shine through!

5. Keep the bride calm - On my wedding day, people kept coming in and out of the brides dressing room. I was a nervous wreck and the last thing I wanted were people coming in and out, in and out. My bridesmaids, without a word from me, put a stop to it. Do whatever the bride needs. It is surprising what bothers you or adds more stress the day of your wedding.

Ceremony:

1. Straighten the bride's train and veil - It drives me crazy when wedding parties do not do that. The bride can't see to do that. You do not have to make a big distraction but gently fix things.

2. Hold the bouquet during the ceremony - Make sure to return it for the recessional too!

3. Perform any tasks in preparation for the reception - If your bouquet is going to be used in a centerpiece, make sure to take all the bridesmaids bouquets, transport them to the reception and placed in the proper vases.

Reception:

1. Bustle the bride's train

2. Participate in wedding party dance if asked to - Shake your groove thing!

3. Try to stay sober and help with any situations that arise - Yes, more than likely someone is going to spill their drink or drop their glass on the dance floor. Be ready to help out and clean up!

4. At the bride's request, take her gown to the dry cleaners - This is such a big help!

5. Transport any gifts after the reception - A lot of people bring gifts to the wedding. Make sure you help get them to the bride's house or you can keep them until the bride gets back from her honeymoon.

I hope that some of the tips are helpful. Tomorrow I will cover the costs of being a bridesmaid. I promise to make it fun!

Happy Monday!

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