February 23, 2015

Things My Husband Says // Volume 1

At one point in my blogging career, I thought about starting a completely separate blog all about Rusty's antics. He says the funniest stuff but the best part is 99% of the time he isn't trying to be funny. Just is.

I wanted to start a somewhat, non baby related post about things that R says. But first let me introduce you to the man that I love dearly.

Photo taken 3 years ago at Wurstfest in New Braunfels.

By day Rusty is a logicstics specialist in fuel and by night, a comedian. He is a natural born entertainer and I always kid that when he is ready we can take his show on the road. I think I almost have him convinced. Rusty is a new Daddy to our baby boy. You know they always say that you fall more in love with your husband when you see them become a Daddy and whoever started that saying couldn't be more correct. Rusty is a good cook but could eat the same thing every night. Grilled chicken, baked sweet potato fries, corn on the cob and fresh skillet green beans. In fact, most nights that is what we eat. Every once in a while we live on the edge and substitute in a pork chop. I know, things get crazy at our casa.

Rusty is great at folding laundry, leaving up the toilet seat, washing the dishes to rap music and the king of collecting opened mail envelopes. I think he thinks they are worth something.

Without further ado, some things Rusty has uttered.

K: Honey, I think I am having Braxton Hicks.
R: When did you change the baby's name?

In regards to a camping trip Rusty recently went on. If you know Rusty, camping isn't his thing. He is a good sport.
R: Honey, I did it!
K: Did what dear?
R: I camped. All weekend.
K: That is great babe!
R: Yeah, I slept in a sleeping bag and everything. Still wearing the same underwear from Friday.

R: Katie, where have all my underwear gone?
K: What do you mean? I have a load of laundry I need to do in the laundry room. Maybe there?
R: No, like 10 pairs are suddenly missing. I have no idea what we did with them.
K: We? I didn't take your underwear dear.
R (Shouting): We have underwear thief's in this house! We must stop them!

K: Thank you for being my best friend (sent via text).
R: Traveled down the road and back again. Your heart is true. Your a pal and confidante. And if you threw a party and invited everyone you knew, the biggest gift would be from me with a card attached that says thank you for being a friend.

R: Listen to this dream that I had. This guy was chasing me at the mall in Jonesboro. I ran and hopped in a strangers car and told them to go, go. Then I realized I was in the car with his band of goons.
K: Band of goons? Wait, what?
R: No bandogoons. One word.

K: Babe, Skipper has a bad poopy diaper.
R: Okay. Let's go change it together.
R & K: Walk to nursery.
R: OH MY GOD! Skip. Honey, I can't do it. begins gagging as he pulls back diaper
K: Crying laughing.
R: Dry heaving. Seriously, I can't. I can't. Katie.
K: Mommy changes diaper.

K: Tells joke.
R: Begins laughing.
K: Babe? Did you just laugh at one of my jokes? Because it never happens.
R: Stops laughing. Oh no. I didn't think that your joke was funny. I am laughing at you because you actually thought that was funny.

R: Is it Skip's bed time yet?
K: Not yet. Why?
R: I can't wait to find out what happens to the silly little hedgehog. Book we are reading to Skip.

R: Honey, let's strip wallpaper in the kitchen to Motown.

Let's just say I am very lucky. I truly mean that.

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